Jobs and No Jobs

I was shamed into posting something on my Blog. Greg my youngest has a gift for words and spelling, in fact that reminds me I have to change the unless to inless, on my China post. Or something like that, I seem to have a memory problem too. Anyway last Friday, I e-mailed Angie and asked if I could borrow her beautiful Shelby on Sunday night. She answered yes, but Johnny didn't have a job anymore. That was it! It was like being hit in the stomach, it took my breath away. I tried calling her, and as usual, she would not answer. So later on I called Johnny, cause he does answer me! And asked what happened and he explained, I was crying and asking him if he was OK, and he said yes. He comforted me, but that's Johnny. You know I fell in love with that kid when I had him in OM, he was game for anything, I think he was in 6Th grade and he was already a wonderful human being. You can imagine my delight when my daughter said she was dating him. I hate the fact that a person as sweet as Johnny is going through this crappy job loss dilemma. Dick, me, Greg, Jessica, we all went through this November of 2006. And I am going through it again with the selling of the Clare store. But its a little easier this time, I have been through it once, I am a little more seasoned for disappointment, not thinking that this could ever happen again, but actually steeling myself for when it is going to happen again. I read Johnny and Greg's blog and you see them praising God for not what they are going through, but him helping them through it. I hope I don't get struck by lightening, but if I do Greg you get this desk, anyway God hasn't really helped me, I don't feel that warm and fuzzy feeling, I just feel PISSED. I have a lot to be thankful for don't get me wrong. And I guess I can understand why I am not his priority, especially when he has wonderful people like Greg and Johnny singing his praises, and all I am doing is complaining. Its like with Greg and Johnny, God is their Bud. But me its like the illegitimate red headed crossed eye child. God has to recognize me, but you can tell he would much rather hang out with his two poster kids. I am not trying to be mean. Funny maybe, but not mean. I had another disappointment today, I didn't get the job that I interviewed for and one of the interviewers, there were I think five, called me to tell me "I was not getting the job", I said "oh," I mean for one thing they never call you and tell you, you didn't get the job! But he went on to tell me he thought I really did a good job interviewing and hoped I would continue to apply, because there were jobs opening up all the time. I thanked him, I am glad he did call, otherwise I would have constantly been waiting by the phone. But I am getting so use to disappointment, that's the scary part. I am getting way to cynical. But you look at Greg and Johnny and you can't stop and wonder where the heck does that faith come from? I guess its this unseeableroute I have taken.